Why Adopt?

I am overwhelmed, truly overwhelmed, by the support we've been shown in the last two days both here and on Facebook since we posted about our adoption. It also was so encouraging to hear how many of you have had adoption on your own hearts as well. I still thought it would might be helpful to follow up our big announcement with two different posts answering possible questions. This one is about why we would adopt in the first place, and the next post (which will be coming Monday) will answer some of the questions about why we're adopting from Ethiopia.

I have to set aside some serious feelings of inadequacy when writing this since so many people have approached this issue and answered these question more clearly than I ever could. But please hear Steven's and my heart in these answers.

Why adopt at all? You already have four kids!
You're right; fertility isn't an issue at our house. But adoption is not just for the infertile. Let me give you three reasons why we will be moving forward with adoption:

1. Because God did it for us- Ultimately the fuel behind this for both Steven and I is that we have been adopted! We were both adopted into God's family. Romans 8:15 reminds us that our relationship with God is not a servant/master relationship, but a father/child relationship, "For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, 'Abba! Father!'" To be able to play out a picture of the gospel is absolutely thrilling!!!

2. Because God has called us to do this- We both feel that our Father has called us as a couple to adopt. The Bible calls Christians specifically to care for the orphans and widows. And in Isaiah 58, God tells His people that He is not interested in their spiritual charades. In verse 7 He says, "Is it not to share your bread with the hungry and bring the homeless poor into your house." Is God calling every Christian couple to adopt? No, I don't believe so. However, I do believe that Jesus laid His own life down for us and is calling us to destroy our idol of comfort and seek out how we can glorify Him and love others.

3. Because we are to live this day for that day- As Christians, this is not home. There is an eternal home waiting for us, and that's where we're called to store up our treasure. We can't take our money or possession with us, but we can take our children (Lord willing) with us. And while here, our aim is glorify God in all of our life. James 1:22-25 says, "But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in the mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts."

There are over 163 million orphans in the world. How can you feel that this is so important for you to do when you're only adopting one?
Absolutely. This couldn't even be considered scratching at the surface. But for the one little girl that is coming into our home, this will mean her life is changed forever. Once an orphan, then in a loving family that will adore her, a mommy to fill her belly up and sing her songs before bed, a daddy to dance with her and read her books, brothers to protect her and make her feel special, sisters to giggle and play dolls with, and a home where she will hear the good news of the gospel over and over again. If there happens to be exactly 163,000,000 orphans in the world right now, we'd like to do everything in our power to make the new number of orphans 162,999,999.


What about your kids? Won't this affect them?
That's true. It will. And that is one of the bonuses in our book!! To teach our kids about serving others and loving orphans in a very up-close-and-personal way is something we hope this adoption will help us do. We know this will play out on a day-to-day level, and we're already trying to prepare them. I'm not here to make my kid's life as easy as possible. I'm here to love them as much as I can and teach them about a Heavenly Father who made a far greater sacrifice for them.


Isn't it expensive?
Compared to what? A vacation? Buying a car?
I promise you it's not nearly as pricey as what it cost God to bring us into His family. He had to give up his son; we simply have to come up with enough money to fund an adoption. It's not even comparable. And God has NEVER ONCE left us high and dry when He calls us to something. And I'm confident that I won't stand at the gates of heaven wishing I'd kept a little more money for myself.

Isn't just the popular thing to do?
This is the nails-on-the-chalkboard question to me. I've wanted to adopt before Angelina Jolie ever stepped into an adoption agency or before almost anyone I knew was adopting. But yet, we've already faced this question. Adoption is gaining some popularity, and that's great. There are kids all over the world that need adoption to get even more PR. However, it's a life-long commitment, and not something to be treated like a fad. Let me assure you that if our motive was to try to do something to look good or to draw attention to ourselves, there are many easier ways to do so.

Don't you know that it's not all roses and butterflies? Adoption is tough stuff!
You better believe it. As I said in my announcement post, God has graciously allowed us to walk through adoption with multiple close friends. We've gotten to see some of the good, the bad, and the ugly. 1 Corinthians 10:31 says, "So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God." Author Francis Chan comments on this verse, "Frankly, you need to get over yourself. It may sound harsh, but that seriously is what [1 Cor. 10:31] means."

Are you sure you're ready to make this sacrifice?
Whoa, hold on. Let me stop you right there. Let's not use the word "sacrifice" when referring to us or this adoption. To quote David Livingstone, a missionary to Africa, "People talk of the sacrifice I have made in spending so much of my life in Africa...I never made a sacrifice. We ought not to talk of 'sacrifice' when we remember the great sacrifice which He made who left His Father's throne on high to give Himself for us."

Our Big News

This post has been on my heart for so long that my fingers are almost shaking as I finally write it out.


I think the best way to start is to tell you how it all began. And to be honest, I've spent a long time trying to figure out exactly when it really did begin. I have held this in my heart for so long that it was hard to remember the starting point. Sometimes it feels like it always was. But I think I narrowed it down to two events in my life that both occurred during the year I was just 15 years old. One was a conversation with my father as we drove home from our local Sanctity of Life ministry on a Saturday. Actually, instead of a conversation, I think it was a single question.


My dad asked me, "If adopting one of those babies would prevent a mother from having an abortion, would you do it?"


My quick answer was a resounding "yes", but it got a ball rolling in my head. What would adopting look like? More than a simple "yes", would I really be available to dive into the life-long commitment of adoption?


Next was a trip to Mexico City and some surrounding areas that summer. When you're 15 years old, the poverty of a place like Tultitlán, a shanty city literally built on the top of a garbage dump, rocks your world. But besides the world-view I took away from that trip, there was one other image that has stuck with me ever since. On the street-corner across from our hotel was a outdoor jewelry seller. And next to the table of goods was a wooden crate holding a beautiful baby girl. For all 6 days of our trip, morning or night, she was there with her cherub face and jet black hair, never moving from that crate. I wanted desperately to scoop her up and take her home with me. Now, no doubt this little girl had parents, and I'm most definitely not advocating that taking her from them would have been good in any way. But that feeling of wanting to pick her up, twirl her around, and bring her home translated into a further openness to adoption.


After the Lord planted this seed, the idea of adoption, grew and grew in my heart. In Ephesians 1:15 I read that: "In love He predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved."  And the more I fell in love with God's Word and understood how He had reached out and adopted me, the more my desire to turn and do the same blossomed.


I believe it was when we were engaged, while Steven and I talked about a family and children, that I asked him if he would ever be open to adoption. At the time, his response was a simple, "I don't know. Maybe."


Three months after we were married, I got pregnant. Five and a half months after Isaiah was born, I stared in shock as a little white stick flashed another plus sign at me. Later, two precious daughters joined our family. So obviously, adoption was not in the regular conversation. But like an old, loved book, every once in a while adoption was pulled off the shelf and flung into our private discussions again. It wasn't something we went around telling people. It was simply a "maybe if we ever get the chance" thought for Steven and a personal burden and quiet prayer for me.


Then, a few years ago, I heard that an acquaintance of mine was planning to adopt from Ethiopia. (Now you should know that right along with my longing to adopt was a heart to adopt from Africa, but that's another story for another post.) I made a bee-line for this woman the next time I saw her, and it was the beginning of a friendship that continues to bless my life. With my new friend, I was able to walk through watching four, yes four, children adopted by this wonderful couple. Suddenly it seemed that adoption was popping up everywhere in my life. Multiple other friends adopted from different places. Even my closest friend was suddenly adopting. I was having a hay-day: fund-raising, baby showers, prayers, and more. It was an absolute delight to watch something so dear to me unfold again and again.


I learned a lot watching my friends adopt; and yet, though my desire was ever increasing, it still didn't seem to be an option for us. We had bought a 3 bedroom condo at the peak of the housing market, and were officially "stuck" in our home. We had talked to two different realtors who had tried to brainstorm with us on ways to buy a bigger place. Both had come to same conclusion: there was no way we would be getting out for a long time. My heart sank. Without a larger home, there was no way we would pass a home study. Plus, while God had allowed Steven's heart to warm up to the idea considerably, he still had a few reservations. And in my heart of hearts I knew that unless he was ready to lead the charge, we couldn't go forward.


I had stopped really praying for a new house because it was impossible...right? As the new year of 2011 dawned, I felt a strong conviction from the Holy Spirit. Was anything impossible with God? I remember telling my mother that the Spirit had put on my heart a New Year's resolution- to start praying with faith for that house we needed.


In April of 2011, there was a distinct moment in the middle of an adoption daydream where I felt God asking me, "If you never are able to adopt, am I still good?" After 15 years of hoping to adopt, this question hit me like a wave. What if God had put adoption on my heart because He knew I would one day have the opportunity to passionately surround other women with this vision? There was a sharp pang in my heart; but right there and then, finding God's grace available to respond, I offered up my hopes and dreams to Him and His good purposes. If adoption wasn't in my future, God was still good.


That next June my husband and I were in Cabo San Lucas celebrating our tenth anniversary. One morning we had prayer time together sitting on a cabana overlooking the Pacific Ocean. We began to pray together for God's direction on whether or not He would ever open up the opportunity to adopt. Suddenly Steven stopped and let out a sharp, "Whoa!" I looked up thinking he had just spotted a dolphin. My husband, Mr. Practical, who up to this point had never had a vision in his life turned to me and said, "As we prayed I saw a little black girl dancing in our living room." I broke down sobbing. After I had come to a place where I was willing to give up this dream, it was like God letting me know that He wasn't asking me to give it up. That morning on the beach was a turning point for Steven. He was convinced that God was clearly calling us to adopt.


And yet, there we were, still living in a tiny condo. To make things more interesting, my husband's job contract was cut in September; and he, along with many others, was laid off. When I thought of buying a house, having our income gone wasn't exactly in my plans.


But it was in God's. He'd moved everything out of the way so that He could show us that He would do the providing, not us.


In October, through a series of events, the miraculous happened. Because this is a public blog, and I don't have the permission of all involved, I won't go into details. But suffice it to say, while out of a job, God provided the money we needed for selling our condo and buying a house. We couldn't move while Steven was out of work, yet still by the end 2011 I had watched my prayers be answered beyond our wildest imagination. We would be able to buy a home. In fact, our condo goes on the market tomorrow.


God used our unemployment to do further work in both our hearts. God tore down idols in our hearts of self-sufficiency and living for comfort. Steven now felt even more strongly than I (if that's possible) that God was calling move forward with an adoption as soon as possible.


So here we are.


And this is our official announcement.


We are pursuing the adoption of a little girl from Ethiopia.


Even though we probably won't meet her for two to three years, we already carry her in our hearts and in our prayers.


It's been a long road coming, but we couldn't be more thrilled, excited, and grateful.

Playground Blacklist

Ah, playgrounds.

I've taken my kids before to playgrounds with an entire foam surface below the equipment. How far we've come since the asphalt playground of my day! Nothing said safely like a sun-heated, hope-you-don't-slip-too-far-off-the-slide black-top. Or how about the see-saw? Now they have them spring-loaded so you no longer have to hope that the sibling on the other end had truly forgiven you for the cheap shot you gave them when Mom wasn't looking.

But the one piece of equipment, I wish they would pull off the playground blacklist is the merry-go-round. Sure you always had one good flung-a-few-yards-from-not-holding-on story and true lunch didn't always stay down, but in the end the joy of a good spin outweighed it all. But there is one park left in our area that hasn't removed the merry-go-round; and it's just about the only thing my kids want to do when we're there.











And Dad attracted practically the entire park with his full-grown-man powered spins:


They kept coming and coming:










Now they have safe things like 8 foot climbing walls for every eager two-year-old:

Stop for a Minute

I didn't plan to post again today, but I'm too moved/upset not to post a link to this article. God has been slowly opening Steven's and my eyes and heart to the world outside of America. As this has happened, one of the ministries we started to follow was Bring Love In in Addis Ababa. The sustainable way in which this group starting to care for both widows and orphans is impossible not to get enthusiastic about.

Steven texted me the link to the posting from their blog today; and I literally stood in an aisle in Costco, cart full of things with which to fill my family's belly, and read this post. First, please stop for a minute and take the time to read this yourself. Second, please try not to fall into what I'll call "Facebook Syndrome." This is when you read something that moves you or convicts you and then you simply click the next link to help that uncomfortable feeling pass. After you read this, I beg you to stop for a minute, pray, and ask God what action you should take.

Here is the post:

I Needed a Reminder Today 
"Last night Yabi and I spent the night sleeping on the street here in Addis Ababa, we have been talking about the life that many of the kids who are going to be coming into our orphanage came from and it became clear that neither of us really fully understand what its like to live as a homeless person in this city. We felt that the only way we would be able to even begin to grasp what it is like is if we were to go and get down in the dirt with them for a night. So that is what we did yesterday..."  READ MORE HERE

My Latest Craving {trying exotic fruit}

Many times when walking through the produce department (especially at my local Asian market), I wondered if I'm missing out. I see fruits that I've never tasted in my life. Part of me has wanted to be adventurous. The other part of me hated to spend money on something I'd never heard of, especially since I had no idea if I (or my kids for that matter) would like. So this past week, I thought I'd tap into my adventurous side and do an exotic fruit taste test with my children. I thought it would be a fun activity, and my kids were happy to imagine themselves as little food critics. I also thought that posting our results might help out anyone else who has ever wondered the same. So we taste-tested lychee, cactus pear, Chinese yali pear, sweet lime, dosakai, dragon fruit, chayote, and rambutan.


Lychee:

When eating lychee, you need to peel of the tough skin and be sure not to eat the seed (which is supposed to be bad for you to ingest).
Mom's take: I was not a fan; it was a bit slimy with a strange flavor.
Kid's take: One of my kids actually liked this, but the other two gave it a thumbs down. Ava didn't even want to try the fruit because of the consistency.

Cactus pear:


For this fruit, you're suppose to cut off the skin and spit out all the little seeds
Mom's take: The flavor wasn't bad but the amount of inedible seeds made this fruit hard to enjoy.
Kid's take: Kiddos agreed with Mom.


Chinese Yali Pear (also known as Asian pear):

You eat this like any other pear.

Mom's take: It was a very fresh, light pear flavor.
Kid's take: This was a unanimous hit with the kids.


Sweet limes

Sweet limes are supposed to be enjoyed in the same way as a regular lime.

Mom's take: I don't know if I got a bad one, but I thought it was bland and a little bitter.
Kid's take: The boys said they liked it.


Dosakai:

You can eat dosakai with or without the skin, one of the things I read suggested sprinkling it with a bit of salt.

Mom's take: The taste reminded me of a robust cucumber flavor. I like the way the salt brought out the flavor.
Kid's take: The boys thought it was a mix of sweet and sour and enjoyed it.


Dragon fruit:

To eat the dragon fruit, you are supposed to cut it longways and scoop out the flesh. The seeds inside are edible.

Mom's take: This had a fresh, exotic flavor.
Kid's take: They agreed that this was their favorite from the taste test. I'm sure the beauty of the outside and the name didn't hurt their opinion!


Chayote-

Chayote should be cooked like a squash. The skin should be removed before eating.
Mom's take: I served this with butter and thought it was quite delicious.
Kid's take: None of them thought this fruit was a keeper.

Rambutan:

To eat this fruit, squeeze with your fingers until the skin splits. Peel off the skin and eat around the seed.
Mom's take: It was sweet with a different, yet appealing flavor.
Kid's take: They said it was "amazing."

For a final wrap up, I can see myself buying the Chinese yali pear, rambutan, and dosakai; and we most definitely will be getting some more dragon fruit.

So I've made commenting easier than ever with the new Facebook commenting added in. Tell me, what's your favorite "exotic fruit." (since there are many more than what I listed)? Maybe next time at the store, I'll give your suggestion a try...

How Very Pinteresting...

My sister, Christine, is only 2 years younger than me. I spent most of my growing up years trying to prove that I was the "big" sister and could do things better than she could. In my late teen years, I finally accepted the truth: God had given me one exceptionally talented little sister to keep me humble. She is Julia Child in the kitchen, Maurizio Pollini on the piano, Martha Stewart in the craft room (try Anthropologie worthy aprons and J. Crew worth t-shirts- all homemade), and to top it off she could get a job in modeling at the drop of a hat. Now that I've accepted the truth, I can sit back and brim with pride.


So since she and her boys enjoy reading The Very Hungry Caterpillar, 

she decided to do her youngest's birthday party with that theme. Check out her Pinterest worthy results:








With Daddy...

And Aunt Margaret...

Watermelon decorating the face of his little friend...

Carter and Adriana played fireman and firetruck dog...

A special guest appearance...

With Mommy and Grandma....

"Sing to me, people!"...



Now can you understand why I struggled not to feel guilty about my Costco cake purchase?!?!

Eleven

This weekend my man and I will be celebrating God's preserving grace to us in the form of eleven years of marriage. The positive is that we're still in the love. For reals. The negative is that when I categorize us in my mind as a young, newly married couple, someone has to bring me back to reality.

This has been quite a full and taxing year for us. The Lord has led us through both the bitter and the sweet. And let me tell you, I have more respect for this man than ever.

You can read HERE some more reasons I adore this man like I do. But for this anniversary post, I thought I'd entertain y'all with a few blast-from-the-past snapshots of hubby and me. (Which is also a study in female hairstyle changes and male pattern balding.)























Happy anniversary, Mr. Sieb. You're my favorite person.